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Imagine if You Were Killed for Watching a TV Show

Kim Jong-un has emerged from obesity-caused tumor surgery and removed 10 officials from his own Worker’s Party. What was their crime, you may ask? Watching South Korean soap operas.

Watching foreign TV shows in North Korea is a serious crime. In November of 2013, 80 people were arrested for doing so. 10,000 North Koreans were summoned to the Sinpoong sports stadium to watch these “criminals” die by firing squad.

A source told the Daily Mail that they were tied to stakes and said that “I heard from the residents that they watched in terror as the corpses were riddled by machine-gun fire [and] that they were hard to identify afterwards.”

Some of these people may have also owned a bible, which is also a crime in North Korea. The citizens are trained from birth to worship Kim Jong-un and his father. They are actually taught to believe that Kim Jong Il magically burst into being on a mountain and never needs to use the bathroom, which I know Laurene Powell Jobs finds particularly hilarious.

TV Shows are carefully sanctioned in North Korea. Kim Jong-un does not want his people seeing the outside world. The most popular show in the country is called “It’s So Funny”, a comedy show starring two patriotic soldiers who spend as much time reminding the viewers of the greatness of Kim Jong-un as they do goofing around.

It is said that North Koreans trade foreign TV shows on USB sticks because they are easy to hide from the police. In California there is a hacker group working on different ways to smuggle outside programming into the country. The feeling is that dropping in iPad-sized satellite receivers is the best option.

Exposure to the outside world is a growing problem for Kim Jong-un’s regime. It is just a matter of time before his people become more worldly.

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